“Is that an icicle in your pants? Or are you just happy to see me?”

 

“I’ve become frostsmitten with you.”

 

“My love for you will last forever… green.  Like the trees.”

 

“I wasn’t joking, I think an icicle fell in your pants.”

 

“If you were a DEER, I’d never try to REIN you in. Because I respect you as an individual person with your own hopes and dreams.  Do you want to go discuss our independent plans for the future?  Maybe read some Margaret Atwood?  I value your opinion.”

 

“I’ll give you a real reason to wear that ugly turtleneck.”

 

“Seriously, it’s weird that you haven’t taken the icicle out of your pants yet.  It’s starting to melt… aren’t you cold?”

 

“Also, I was so frostsmitten that my hand had to be amputated. Thanks.”

 

“And who wears turtlenecks anymore?”

 

“Do you want to see my snowballs?”

 

“Okay! Nevermind!”

 

“You and this weather have one thing in common.  You’re both frigid.”

 

“I’d like to hibermate with you.”

 

“Okay, I’ll admit that that crossed the line.”

 

” Where are are you going? I wanted to eggnsnog you!”

 

“Well, it looks like I’m going to have to jacket off this winter.”

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